My momma said there’d be days like this, but I didn’t believe her.

Some people have the "luck of the Irish" and some people have notoriously bad luck. I usually fall somewhere in between, but yesterday turned from a dreary, crappy day to a seriously dreary comedy of errors.

On my way to lunch yesterday, a girl decided to change lanes, and got an object lesson in Newton's laws of motion, as well as the fundamental law of matter: two pieces of matter cannot occupy the same space at the same time. (Only minor damage occurred, and none to me…) After getting the pertinent information from her, I took the afternoon off to take my car to get the driver's side mirror replaced. She decided to pay the cost out of pocket, so I had to fill out a TON of paperwork and hassle to make sure that the bill would, indeed, be paid. After a couple hours of this, I ended up calling Enterprise to rent a car since mine wouldn't be finished until this afternoon.

They came and picked me up and stuffed me, the 4^th and 5^th octave of Schulmerich chimes, and all of my assorted flotsam that I was taking from my car into the back seat of a PT Cruiser. The guy in the front seat was totally not amused (especially when I ended up with his stuff on my lap to make way for the chimes). By the time we leave the body shop, it is pouring rain, and we get soaked on our way into the car rental shop.

Come to find out, Enterprise has two cars available: a Kia Spectra or … the PT Cruiser we just went for a ride in. The other passenger and I look incredulously at each other and at the same time say, "Are you kidding?!?" He (thankfully) decided to take an upgrade, leaving me with the Kia Soupcan. The lady starts putting my information in the computer, and just as she finishes, there is a HUGE flash of lightning and the power goes off.

It was only off for about 5 minutes, but when it came back on, one of the agents said (and, no, I'm NOT kidding), "Wow. The computer is off. Is it safe to turn on?" After we did get her to turn her computer back on, she said, "I can't believe it came on! I KNOW I saw a huge flash right before it went off." To which I replied under my breath: "Of course. It was lightning."

The other customer started cracking up. That got her attention, so he did some fast talking to cover my ass (thank you Unknown Gentleman!).

Since it was raining, they were nice and pulled the Soupcan into the "maintenance garage" (read: a small space the size of my apartment's kitchen) to load the chimes. After much schlepping, we got the chimes into the teeny-weeny trunk and I was ready to sign the paperwork. Then we noticed the totally flat driver's side tire.

Unschlepped the chimes and loaded them into the (free upgrade) Ford Explorer. I'm on my way. Excellent. Went to lunch at 3:30 to celebrate.

I decided to go to the bank to get cash for the weekend, and my card slid out of the ATM right under the Explorer. I tried to get out to pick it up, but between my boots and my boobs, I was wedged in. The bank employees were enjoying my distress and finally, I just drove the Explorer out and walked through the ATM. It was still raining.

I went home on my way to make a recording for the band director, and as soon as I got out, God turned on the Heavenly Faucet. I got instantly drenched, and was not protected from the brutal north wind by my north-facing apartment. I opened the door, and slid on the tile into splits that would do an Olympic gymnast proud. In the process, I bent my house key, rendering my apartment open to the masses while I was out recording. Joyful.

This morning, I get a call from the girl who hit me. She thinks that we have some things in common. We're having dinner together tonight. (No, it's NOT a date. She's married.)

Does this stuff happen to anyone else? All in the same day?!? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller?